I have more good news from the Validation Express: There’s nothing inherently sloth-like about yoga pants.
Asking for fashion advice can feel daunting, even shaming—unless you're a white, cis, blonde size 2, it can often feel like an entire industry has banished you to the land of Frumpdom. Well sucks to that, we say! Fashion is for everyone—fat girls, feminist girls, girls who get cold really easily, and girls who just don't feel "girly" alike.
To help us create an inclusive platform for fashion knowledge, we've asked our resident aesthetic ace Winona Rose to answer our questions—and yours!—about how to look our best, even if the fashion industry has dealt us the worst of hands.
Dear Winona,
Ok here's my fashion dilemma. It's twofold.
1) I'm 40. I don't want to look 20. But also I don't want to look 60. For example. I like distressed jeans. Should I not be wearing distressed jeans? In my viral article someone criticized me for looking like a slob.
2) I have a tendency to ALWAYS choose blousey (read: maternity-looking) because I'm fat and tight clothes are quite simply painfully and revealingly uncomfortable. I spend most of my time at home, and therefore in yoga pants. I loathe jeans. Jeans are my nemesis. How do I dress for home without either looking like a sloth or like I'm headed out for a date? I have not included photos of myself in yoga pants because I don't have any. Because who would take a picture looking like a sloth.
- Joni
Dear Joni,
Alright, let’s dive into topic #1: Distressed jeans. One word: yes.
You should totally be wearing distressed jeans. Ignore the commenter who said you looked like a slob. Once a commenter said I was so ugly I should give up on fashion and wear a burlap sack and a paper bag over my head to spare the world the horror of looking at me, and guess what? I have yet to enter the burlap sack section at Nordstrom!
Distressed Jeans Reality Check
Anyway, here’s a reality check: distressed jeans are comfy, sexy, cool, eternally trendy, and there is absolutely no age requirements for wearing them. Sure, people out of their teens miiiiiiight want to avoid that new style of distressed jeans the Kardashians wear that contain more holes than denim by surface area (and somehow still stay together?). But hey, even if you were into those, in the right context, you could totally pull them off.
The key to wearing items like distressed jeans as a grown-up is balancing out their youthful casualness a bit. Jeans with holes in them obviously bring a majorly casual vibe, which is great if you’re hanging out at home or walking the dog, but if you want to look more pulled together, I’d suggest wearing them with a blouse that has a little more structure and polish.
As a fellow Lady With An Ample Tummy, I’m obsessed with pairing my distressed jeans with split neck tunics that hit just below the hip. This one is my current favorite, and it comes in petite, regular, and plus sizes. The open neckline is super flattering, the rayon fabric skims over your stomach and doesn’t cling like jersey, and the details at the shoulders and sleeves keep it modern and chic. Cuff up your distressed jeans, add a pair of wedge sandals or ankle boots, plus a classic purse, and you’ll look stylish, current, and decidedly grown-up.
The Lowdown On Homewear Chic
Alright, onto your “What do I wear at home?” dilemma. I have more good news from the Validation Express: There’s nothing inherently sloth-like about yoga pants. In fact, I recently bought my first pair of classic black, flare-leg yoga pants, and I was shocked at how, despite their propensity for camel toe, the silhouette is shockingly sophisticated. I mean, they’re sleek, simple, and curvy—three adjectives I love!
The secret to feeling and look good around the house without trying too hard? Paying attention to the quality and upkeep of your clothing. I learned this from years of working from home full-time. There’s a big difference between wearing a nice pair of black yoga pants and a clean white t-shirt, or a pilled, faded, stretched-out pair of black yoga pants and an old white t-shirt with a big hole in the armpit and a ketchup stain on it.
You can definitely keep things simple and comfortable but try to avoid things you wouldn’t wear in public—for example, anything with major stains, holes, or that just straight-up doesn’t fit. Even if you don’t see anyone all day, I’ve found it communicates a level of self-care to choose clothing that’s nice, comfortable, well cared-for, and wouldn’t cause massive embarrassment if you needed to wear it to run out to pick up some groceries and didn’t have time to change. Once I realized this, I stocked up on basics like leggings, cute hoodies, sweaters, and flowy t-shirts.
Other at-home outfit options I love that don’t involve jeans: black leggings (again, in good condition! Zella is my favorite brand) and oversized v-neck sweaters that almost qualify as sweater dresses (I like to get them in the men’s section at thrift stores). And stretch jersey dresses, always. This one would look fantastic on you, especially in that cerulean blue! So great for summer too.
Also can we talk about the floral frock you’re wearing in that picture? It is so cute and I just found out you MADE IT and now I really want you to make me one. Deal? Thanks!
Have a question for Winona Rose? Drop us a line at Ravishly@ravishly.com.
